SEASONS, expanded; Lonely Tombs; Banners of Love; Inner Light

SEASONS

It's been over a year that my husband, Donald died.
A time of changes,alternate feelings of loneliness and grieving, yet
a year of graces and growth, also.
A time of trying to live and focus in the present moment,
 while remembering  the good times that were spent.
A time of  family sharing  and holidays.
A time of taking baby steps forward, and a few backwards,
learning to lean on others and
trusting in a higher power and a total dependence of God's Presence to help make decisions.

When Hospice sent the colorful invitation stating "Art Heals"
I thought, "maybe it's time to step out a little further,
the art sounds good to me!"
Being late and warmly greeted, I felt fairly relaxed and listened.
As others shared, a sense of being confirmed by their experiences
gave me confidence to speak and a realization that I could contribute, also.

Two weeks later was our next gathering.
Yes! I returned, on time, meeting new people and we laughed as Jenny,
Jan, Jinny, Ann and Bert met Jean! so many "J's"!
There were many tender moments and little""miracle happenings" shared that day!
We were given a page of words to look at and encouraged to listen within;
 to  share what emotion or thought might arise, if we chose to.

These writings came to me at home in the stillness of mind and heart
wrapped in Presence.

LONELY TOMBS

Lonely tombs find a tiny breakthrough, violent...

Feeling alone...

Having sadness flow into

 the wreckage...

 is hard work!

                                                           

Caress the Silences...

It's okay to feel the flat,
                               empty spaces...                           

This Season will pass!

BANNERS OF  LIGHT

In the Silences...

Prayer, wrapped in ease...

                             God speaks in whispers...

                    Through dreams,

                           Soothing inspirations,

                              And empty places of want.

SEASONS

Seasons bring Inner Light...

A simple "yes"

Bends and brightens the darkness

As it flows into the Dawn.

Soothing buds of Inspiration

Sing out in a sharing

  To be cradled as Wisdom.

Jean Mahan ofs 

Feb. 02, 2017

  

GRASS ROOTS: A problem cannot be solved by the same consciousness that created it....

"A problem cannot be solved

By the same consciousness that created it"

                                                Albert Einstein

Grass Roots

At some point in my formation, whether through the years of the Franciscan teachings
 at the Monastery in Maine, where we spent our summers, and
the Charismatic renewal in the early years and/or the many morning Mass teachings from our pastor, 

a vague memory of a teaching came to mind upon reading 

and "pondering" the meaning behind the above statement...

"A problem cannot be solved by the same consciousness that created it."

There was something about "hearts that needed changing", and "grassroots"...
meaning change may need to come from within hearts,
 before any great changes take roots and grow up through the generations.
Changes within the heart... instead of only thinking  and seeking  intellectual answers,
  imposing rules and expecting  quick solutions.
Yet we do need the roots of a foundation
which brings  us Hope.

"A problem cannot be solved by the same consciousness that created it".

What does that mean?
For me, it brings more questions than answers.
As generations evolve, do they bring with them a new consciousness?
Is there a new way of seeing, hearing and seeking, according to the Truth?
We are endowed with a thirst for the Truth if and when we
 search for a better way to live.

  It is no secret that we have all been deceived,in some way,
by the Liar and Deceiver... the enemy of the soul, who seeks to kill.
A mindset, a wound in need of healing, habits unchecked, can become
a way of life "unconsciously" lived without seeking change.

"A problem cannot be solved by the same consciousness that created it"

Jesus never refused to visit and enter a sinners house!
All manners of healing ensued and lives were changed when He entered in!
Do we have a right to deny a listening heart to one in need of speaking ? No matter what that need may be?
Everyone has a desire to be listened to and in that process, maybe a heart will be changed
 and a new consciousness will emerge... for it all comes down to
a desire to grow and change from within.
Jesus calls each one to love and care for one another.

"Whatever you do for the least of (your brothers and sisters), you do for Me."

Through the many years, on this journey in Faith...seeking Truth and meaning for my own life,
there has always been new discoveries...  some that were very difficult and resisted for a time...yet
God was always  there, patiently waiting for me to respond.
 There is always more to know and to learn...a deeper way to love, and
 a never ending opening into the Kingdom.
Our Father God, is always renewing and re-creating us into His image and likeness.
Our Eternal God never sleeps...He is not a "static, at rest, God!"

Father ..change our hearts. Jesus, lead us into Your Merciful Love. Holy Spirit
open our minds and enlighten us,guide us deeper into your Presence, we pray.
 Help each one of us to come to You with open hearts, wherever You find us!
 Amen

I FEEL OPEN...to explore the depth...

I FEEL OPEN

I feel open to explore the depth and width and

 breadth of God's love for me...

To step over the boundaries of fear

that may be holding me back from experiencing

the "whole person"  I am  meant to become.

I feel open to tread gently upon the "new ground"

of my being.

 I feel open to discover the new possibilities 

that need awakening within...

slowly, gently, lovingly calling me forward

as new life unfolds.

I sense a need for caution and prudence as this new

energy emerges.

There is a need to stay closely tuned to the 

movements of my soul speaking within. 

I feel an openness to the "Voice of Silence" and It's wordless call.

I feel a yearning to connect with the Infinite Spirit of God...

to express His message of Love and Hope
in a world full of uncertainty and despair...

To bring Peace...if for a moment...

 into a troubled heart.

              10-23-2005

MORE TO MY STORY :The Path of Light

More to the Story: The Path of Light

Most of my "life's stories " began with a word heard at  prayer, "COME!"

 I followed...hesitantly, and began a process of listening and resisting.

 Jesus and I began walking together, and a transformation was taking place.

Fr. Holland used to use the image of a tapestry being made. Row upon row of weaving colorful threads.
 On the back, many tangles and loose threads, messy,

not making any semblance of a picture. Yet, when finished and all in proper order,

 and seen from the other side, was something beautiful !

The Light of Christ prayer group at Notre Dame Church was the continuing place of the tapestry of my life  that God,the Father, began weaving anew. There is a beautiful  beginning much earlier that may be shared later, how God brought my love and soul mate Donald into my life. Without him, nothing would be the same! He was the loving spark of my awakening!

Prayer was seen as the "umbilical cord of life" to God.Our Charismatic prayer group  met each week in the basement of the church. Prayer, praise, gratitude, song,they all had a place in our daily lives.

 Fr. Oliver and Fr. Imse were there to celebrate the  sacraments of the Eucharist and Reconciliation.

I knew more than I understood. There was so much Mystery to God's ways! His Words were touching and penetrating my heart. I was being so filled,yet, what did all of this mean to my life? It was all such a puzzle!

Then, we were offered a "Life in the Spirit Seminar" which would introduce us to the Third Person of the Holy Trinity. As I had "met" Jesus in the Al-Anon group, I thought this would be the next step closer to 

knowing the Triune God , Who was trying to break through to me. I was also battling depression and needed much prayer for healing. So I entered into the seminar, trusting the leaders of the prayer group.

At our parish of St. Joseph's church, Fr. Holland announced from the pulpit, one Sunday, that
there would be no classes for religious education for the 6th through 8th grades

 because there were no teachers available. What a shock that was!

Both Don and I wanted our children to have the benefits of the Catholic faith. Don had entered the Catholic church as a convert and I was not taught the faith, but was beginning to understand
the importance of a Godly life. 

We approached Fr. and mentioned our concerns. He gave us each a book and said we could learn.
 "Just stay one week ahead of the children's lesson and come to me with any questions".

What? We were on our way!???  

  God,Help us!

What an awesome God we have! And what curves He can throw at us!

Don had a wonderful Pastor as he grew up in the First Congregational Church and he had been a
leader there in many ministries.

I was at a loss and so nervous and anxious! What did I know? Nothing! 

How would I even begin to put any of this together?

Opening the book to teach the 7th grade children the Sacraments of the Church was not my idea at all!

Who could ever imagine what God may have had in mind! Not me!

"His thoughts are so far beyond our  thoughts,

His ways so far beyond our ways"

As I look back at all this , I was never alone!
My friend, Randy, would say"God always shows up and He is never late!"
Of course He showed up!  I met and fell in love with
The Holy Spirit, Who began to teach me!
Jesus said...
"The Advocate,the holy Spirit that the Father will send in my name-
He will teach you everything and remind you of all( I )told you." John; 14:26
And that's the Truth!

This was all taking place around the year 1980. Our youngest daughter was attending college,
and there was plenty of time for me to study. I had never opened, what we call, the Old Testament.
However, I was reading the gospels of Jesus and attending Mass daily to receive the holy Eucharist of the Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity of our Lord, Jesus Christ.
Living my daily life, working part time, serving in the church,caring for family now brought a deeper dimension to life. Our marriage and relationships had improved, I had a prayer life beginning, we were trying to follow the scriptures as they pertained to our lives, and I was able to begin tithing what was earned from my job at the hospital . Placing God first brought balance and more peace, even through the struggles we encountered. Don and I began to pray together after our Marriage Encounter weekend.
What a breakthrough that was for both of us!
 We were surrounded by loving couples willing to share and encourage us.
Yes! It takes commitment and some perseverance to continue, and when progress is experienced
along the way, everyone, the whole family, benefits.  

Asking the holy Spirit in prayer to enlighten me.. and to guide me ...
I began to read the books of the old  Testament beginning with Genesis.

"If you love Me, you will keep my commandments.
 And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Advocate to be with you always,
the Spirit of Truth..." John; 14:15+16

The Spirit of Truth began to open the prophetic messages from the old testament,
connecting them with God's promises of sending signs and wonders through a Savior,
who would bring a new Covenant to save humanity from all sin and disbelief.
To the degree that my little mind could understand,
this Spirit of Truth was teaching me and connecting the old Covenant signs and symbols
forward into the New Testament, confirming the new Covenant of God in Jesus Christ.

At home one evening after prayer I lingered to listen.
A stream of words began flowing..."what is this?" was my reaction.
Reaching for paper and pen...so as to lose nothing,  came the above
"Path of Light" poem writing ... maybe showing me where I was being led;
for this was another one of those times when God intervened and threw
anther curve changing my life!
This time he prepared the way in a very different manner.
Meeting Sister Marie Dugas, a sister of St. Ann, brought me in line with
an introduction to contemplative prayer and a deeper healing within the love of God.

 With God, there is always more!

THE PATH OF LIGHT

THE PATH OF LIGHT

Jesus sought to walk His path of Light
through darkened tunnels of my night.
My anguished heart cried out to Love's own Face
to heal the wounds the years did trace
upon this child.
Left to seek her own pursuits she stumbled...fell...
 to rise again and find
she had a destiny.

Can it be true that Love and Light
would lead onward toward the night, so dark,
so deep, so filled with fright?
Yes! It is true that Light pervades the
deepest pool
where unknown forces seek to rule.

Our heritage of Adam's root gives way to Word
that cuts the ties of fear and lies and shame.
The Word of God does enter in
to places no one else has been.
Creation once more takes it's part
in patient stillness from the heart.

It was all so new... I dare to say,
"the Lord has been there faithfully since first I sought Him with my prayer!"
Then came a time when I knew the Light within
would shine all through those darkened ways
to make me new!

It's just another step with Him,
Who opens to Eternity.
And I... my Lord did see... with eyes of faith given me...
His hands... His feet... were nailed and torn
for me to rise on Easter morn!

UNDERSTANDING: A GIFT OF INSIGHT

UNDERSTANDING

A Gift of Insight

Insights are born of silences and come as felt gentle breezes on a clear day

or a gentle waves caressing the shoreline.

At other times "breakthrough waves"  may desire to submerge us in its' strength,
yet washes over moving us forward, diminishing itself upon the shoreline.
A breakthrough wave may surge and if we are not prepared,standing firmly,
We may be toppled and tossed about to scrape the oceans' stoney floor.
Again, we may simply choose to float, letting the wave meet and carry us until it passes.

One day at the edge of the shoreline, laying on a float, I was comforted in the warmth of sunshine,
the sounds of seagulls and calmness of gentle breezes.
Time passed.
I gently felt a lifting movement under the float!
As I awoke I realized the water had quietly approached, lifting me.
How gentle God can be in patiently waiting...
Everything...all we ever need will come to us from Him...
The One Who has the power to move mountains, part the Red Sea,
 Set prisoners free...comes to enter our space to be a Saviour!
He comes to each one giving all that is needed...
If only we wait in trusting confidence.

"You are Mine! I created you to be...
Have no fear for I AM always with you ...My precious one.
Like a flame which grows stronger in Light within the darkness...
So are you...My precious one."

THE CONDESCENDING GOD

ON THE CONDESCENSION OF GOD

 Saint John Chrysostom...quotes:

"God does not appear as He really is, but according to the capacity of the one who seeks to "contemplate Him."

According to the dictionary, the meaning of the word condescend reads: " to descend from the privileges of superior rank",  "to condescend to give."

To some degree, God is apparently present in each human person according to the capacity of our

Contemplation of Him !

 Do you think about God? Do you see His way of working in your daily life?

Would our capacity to see God increase if we did make prayer a daily commitment?

Would the world be a better place if we allowed God's Presence to enter more deeply into our lives?

"With God all things are possible"(Matthew 19:26)

When making my very first retreat, in the late 1970's, a priest suggested that I find and attend a prayer group. I didn't even know that prayer groups existed!   One of the retreatants  invited me. It just happened to be in the area, so...I decided to go.

The group was very inviting, joyful in song and praise and uplifting in spirit! It was the joy that I was seeking...and I wondered what their secret was...so I returned.

The next week, Mr. Boucher was teaching about prayer, and time to be with God in prayer. He gave us suggestions on beginning...

Commit to making a date with God each day.

Make a quiet, comfortable space at home to retreat to.

Begin with 5 or 10 minutes each day.

Choose a sacred word to consent to God's presence within.

With eyes closed, silently... say the sacred word.

When thoughts enter in, gently return to the sacred word.

At the end of the prayer time, remain silent with eyes closed.

Pray an our Father.

This centering prayer became a door of peace allowing graces to enter.

In the silence I heard the word, "Come!" I was encouraged!

This prayer became a way of life and I hungered for the peace and Presence.
Little did I know how much this would continue to change my outlook and inner being.

With a growing family of four children, a dog, and a working husband, who also was a call fireman and  an ambulance driver, my daily date with God in prayer was a little bit of heaven!

 My time needed to be taken seriously and kept. It wasn't easy to do! I began by explaining and seeking ten minutes without interruptions. There was a sign on my door " GOD AT WORK !"
After a time the children must have seen a difference in me and all was well!