THE GIFT...a transforming Presence

A TRANSFORMING PRESENCE

If not for the wounds, where would I be?

The years of fear distinguished me.

Hidden in the depths of my inner child,

years of darkness bitter sweet,

held shameful secrets incomplete.

My wounds received when just a babe

Have grieved me through the years.

I cried aloud to reach the One

Who could dispel my fears.

Crying...begging...praying...listening,

Provided me my destiny.

Nor did I know that with the wounds

a new life would begin.

If not for His wounds where would I be?

Jesus stripes liberated me...
 to heal,

to forgive,
 to set this  prisoner free.

Came the day it all broke through...

Unknown images unleashed, propelled into the Light,

Exposing confusion, disorder and fright!

THE GIFT

Stands a Tree that gifted me from it's opened side..

Oh, the gift it gave to me came flowing from inside...

That opened wound pierced by a sword

Was given in love for me.

"A Gift!" It said, "A gift made yours...

Of Grace,
 Of hunger, pain and quest.

To ease your broken heart,

You sought your loving Savior

To live with you as Guest!"

Jesus knows the way to lead where wholeness

And forgiveness meet.

Within His gentle, loving Heart,

His Presence and His Grace,

Lives Hope and Trust anew.

2 Corinthians 5:17-20

RANDOM THOUGHTS: GENESIS, two great lights...

GENESIS  1: 1-19

TWO GREAT LIGHTS

Two great lights ...

To serve as luminaries

Upon the earth...

The ONE greater

To govern the day...Jesus

The lesser one 

To soften the night...Mary.

 God made the stars...

Set them in the sky...

To shed light upon the earth...Saints


"LAZARUS...COME OUT!"

Jesus knew Lazarus' death was an act of God to show His power..
He waited for God to act before he went to his friends.

To the degree we seek to control, do we trust God to act?

Martha sent for Jesus and ran to tell Him, to scold Him,of her brother's death.
Did she really believe in the resurrection,or just wanted her brother alive, now?
Mary did not come out with her friends until Jesus arrived,why? She sat within the house.
She  had previously anointed Jesus with oil,as a sign of His coming death.
 Did she know and believe then, that Jesus would resurrect? An inner knowing?
 Maybe a mystical experience as she sat at His feet, that day?

To the degree we seek to control, do we trust God to act?

Lazarus was being grieved as dead! They believed he died.
Did their thoughts keep him bound; tied hand and foot with burial bands?
Can we actually do that if we do not believe?

 Why was Jesus perturbed?
Yes, He was sad. His good friend was dead!
 Humanly, He wold miss Lazarus. Jesus cried for that reason, understandably.
But scripture here says that Jesus was "perturbed," twice.
Perturbed in the dictionary, is described to mean, disturbed, agitated,disquieted.
Was He thinking, once again, "How long do I need to be with you until you learn?"

How many times I could say to myself in a situation, 'Oh! will I ever learn!!!?"
How many times do You have to remind me of something known, yet hadn't sunk -in deeply, yet.?
And I wonder, what tone-of-voice  Jesus would have used, trying to teach me?
" Have I not told you that if you believe, you will see the Glory of God!"

Father, God...thank You for your infinite patience and unending love shown to me...
 not only You, but all those around me,waiting for me to awaken
 to a new fullness of your loving Presence each day, each moment.
Help me to love more and wait upon You to act.
Help me to let go of my own ways that seek to control;
and thanks that You teach me I am loved, no matter where I am in this picture.
Amen

"OH, THAT TODAY YOU WOULD HEAR HIS VOICE!"

OH, THAT TODAY YOU WOULD HEAR HIS VOICE

On the third Sunday of Lent, there ran a desire within my heart to hear a Word that could be pondered and carried within, to be nourished and be fulfilled, during the Lenten mission and lived.

As we listened, the Psalm of the Mass was read.

 My heart melted as the Words spoken entered in  caressing my mind, resting there...

"Oh, that today you would hear His voice!"

                                                             Psalm 95. 

"OH, THAT TODAY YOU WOULD HEAR HIS VOICE;

"IF TODAY YOU HEAR HIS VOICE, HARDEN NOT YOUR HEART."

Come Monday morning and the beginning of our Lenten retreat, we were also to celebrate Saint Joseph's feast day! I was ready to listen and learn! Fr. Simeon was teaching and it would be a wonderful week!

 Earlier that morning, as the "Our Father" was prayed,  v e r y  s l o w l y....

These words,  "MINE IS THE KINGDOM" resonated, speaking to me, having a newer, deeper, awesome, meaning!
This universe, this planet, this life, is created with each one of us, individually, in the loving thoughts of the Creative process of our maker! He made the entire universe so  that there would be the exact elements needed to create man from the clay of the Earth!
  Imagine that!
We were called forth into His Kingdom! A Kingdom leading toward an Eternity spent in loving  the King, the Father of all creation, Our Father!
To follow this,  we have been invited into this Kingdom! I, we, are not summoning the king into our lives...He is called each one to Himself through Jesus and though His messenger and teacher, the Holy Spirit!

 Something else was to be lived out!
I was to listen and trust more in the Providential care of God.
 That is a little difficult to explain.
Living in the moment!

 That meant for me, accepting "what is at the moment", not complaining or trying to change any situation. It meant trusting more...trusting that God's plan is unfolding before my eyes.

 At this very moment, He would take care of everything, "if I could let Him!"

And let Him, I must do...! Change nothing and ask nothing else to be in it's place!
Just "Be"!

Okay, God! I think I got it!

So,wonders never cease!
 As I drove the car Tuesday morning, a strange, new, strong sound emanated from the motor! I realized the car needed urgent care! I drove it immediately to the mechanic,

 who took it right in to be diagnosed, and kept it there!
Kept it there!

 I now had no car to travel to the Lenten mission! Maybe I had forgot to pray,"Lord, don't put me to the test!?"

A ride home was provided and there was a lovely opportunity to spend time with a dear friend.
Everything was provided...offers came to take me for groceries, and others called, who were unaware of my circumstances, to bring me to mass and the Lenten retreat, either day or evening!
Providential care from God was happening before my very eyes!

"Jesus, continue to show the Father's loving care in all circumstances of life, for we have entered into Your Kingdom as "called guests". Help me to remember and to submit to Your great Plan for life lived in the Presence of Your Kingship through the love of Jesus, and the power of your Holy Spirit."
                                                                                           Amen

"OH, THAT TODAY YOU WOULD HEAR HIS VOICE!"

THE SERVANT OF THE LORD

"WHY DID NO ONE ANSWER WHEN I CALLED?"

We are celebrating the first full week in the Lenten Season. It is a time to seek that open door 

that we may have slammed closed behind us.

 Today we read the story of Jonah hearing a call he sought to ignore.

. Running away from the call he heard clearly, he endured pain, suffering many trials and hardships.
He came to realize that he was the cause of the troubles.

When Jonah heard the call of God a second time, he hastened to answer.

Putting aside his own understanding, Jonah obeyed, and God was faithful, saving Nineveh!

 God calls us to what is best for our own salvation.

"IS MY HAND TOO SHORT TO RANSOM?

HAVE I NOT THE STRENGTH TO DELIVER?"

The theme of Jonah's story in scripture met me in a painful place of a a dry spell, a sense of emptiness and an abandonment of energy lived out of less daily prayer. These are symptoms of my running away, retreating from what God may be asking of me. Asking only that I continue to go forward, unknowingly, using words to encourage others on their journey, for the glory of the God of all creation. 

Of course, my plan for me was a different scenario. I realized that my being was not only rebelling, but that a grieving sentiment had set in. I wanted it all to be different than what God was asking...
just like Jonah did !Yes!  Angry at God for not having it my way.

Receiving the Graces of being reconciled in Confession renewed the flow of the Holy Spirit
 as the blockage left me.

 "MORNING AFTER MORNING HE OPENS MY EAR TO HEAR!"(Isaiah 50:10)

O' Breath of God , come set me free

From weighing burdens set on  me

Unforgiveness keeps us apart

When anger resides within my heart.

Make me willing to see my plight;

Open my ears, give me the light

That I may look within my soul

To see what keeps me from the goal

Of love of neighbor and of self.

Let me not too busy be,to sit

To ponder, to stay with Thee

Until my heart does soften more

And I can open a once closed door.

SEASONS, expanded; Lonely Tombs; Banners of Love; Inner Light

SEASONS

It's been over a year that my husband, Donald died.
A time of changes,alternate feelings of loneliness and grieving, yet
a year of graces and growth, also.
A time of trying to live and focus in the present moment,
 while remembering  the good times that were spent.
A time of  family sharing  and holidays.
A time of taking baby steps forward, and a few backwards,
learning to lean on others and
trusting in a higher power and a total dependence of God's Presence to help make decisions.

When Hospice sent the colorful invitation stating "Art Heals"
I thought, "maybe it's time to step out a little further,
the art sounds good to me!"
Being late and warmly greeted, I felt fairly relaxed and listened.
As others shared, a sense of being confirmed by their experiences
gave me confidence to speak and a realization that I could contribute, also.

Two weeks later was our next gathering.
Yes! I returned, on time, meeting new people and we laughed as Jenny,
Jan, Jinny, Ann and Bert met Jean! so many "J's"!
There were many tender moments and little""miracle happenings" shared that day!
We were given a page of words to look at and encouraged to listen within;
 to  share what emotion or thought might arise, if we chose to.

These writings came to me at home in the stillness of mind and heart
wrapped in Presence.

LONELY TOMBS

Lonely tombs find a tiny breakthrough, violent...

Feeling alone...

Having sadness flow into

 the wreckage...

 is hard work!

                                                           

Caress the Silences...

It's okay to feel the flat,
                               empty spaces...                           

This Season will pass!

BANNERS OF  LIGHT

In the Silences...

Prayer, wrapped in ease...

                             God speaks in whispers...

                    Through dreams,

                           Soothing inspirations,

                              And empty places of want.

SEASONS

Seasons bring Inner Light...

A simple "yes"

Bends and brightens the darkness

As it flows into the Dawn.

Soothing buds of Inspiration

Sing out in a sharing

  To be cradled as Wisdom.

Jean Mahan ofs 

Feb. 02, 2017

  

GRASS ROOTS: A problem cannot be solved by the same consciousness that created it....

"A problem cannot be solved

By the same consciousness that created it"

                                                Albert Einstein

Grass Roots

At some point in my formation, whether through the years of the Franciscan teachings
 at the Monastery in Maine, where we spent our summers, and
the Charismatic renewal in the early years and/or the many morning Mass teachings from our pastor, 

a vague memory of a teaching came to mind upon reading 

and "pondering" the meaning behind the above statement...

"A problem cannot be solved by the same consciousness that created it."

There was something about "hearts that needed changing", and "grassroots"...
meaning change may need to come from within hearts,
 before any great changes take roots and grow up through the generations.
Changes within the heart... instead of only thinking  and seeking  intellectual answers,
  imposing rules and expecting  quick solutions.
Yet we do need the roots of a foundation
which brings  us Hope.

"A problem cannot be solved by the same consciousness that created it".

What does that mean?
For me, it brings more questions than answers.
As generations evolve, do they bring with them a new consciousness?
Is there a new way of seeing, hearing and seeking, according to the Truth?
We are endowed with a thirst for the Truth if and when we
 search for a better way to live.

  It is no secret that we have all been deceived,in some way,
by the Liar and Deceiver... the enemy of the soul, who seeks to kill.
A mindset, a wound in need of healing, habits unchecked, can become
a way of life "unconsciously" lived without seeking change.

"A problem cannot be solved by the same consciousness that created it"

Jesus never refused to visit and enter a sinners house!
All manners of healing ensued and lives were changed when He entered in!
Do we have a right to deny a listening heart to one in need of speaking ? No matter what that need may be?
Everyone has a desire to be listened to and in that process, maybe a heart will be changed
 and a new consciousness will emerge... for it all comes down to
a desire to grow and change from within.
Jesus calls each one to love and care for one another.

"Whatever you do for the least of (your brothers and sisters), you do for Me."

Through the many years, on this journey in Faith...seeking Truth and meaning for my own life,
there has always been new discoveries...  some that were very difficult and resisted for a time...yet
God was always  there, patiently waiting for me to respond.
 There is always more to know and to learn...a deeper way to love, and
 a never ending opening into the Kingdom.
Our Father God, is always renewing and re-creating us into His image and likeness.
Our Eternal God never sleeps...He is not a "static, at rest, God!"

Father ..change our hearts. Jesus, lead us into Your Merciful Love. Holy Spirit
open our minds and enlighten us,guide us deeper into your Presence, we pray.
 Help each one of us to come to You with open hearts, wherever You find us!
 Amen

I FEEL OPEN...to explore the depth...

I FEEL OPEN

I feel open to explore the depth and width and

 breadth of God's love for me...

To step over the boundaries of fear

that may be holding me back from experiencing

the "whole person"  I am  meant to become.

I feel open to tread gently upon the "new ground"

of my being.

 I feel open to discover the new possibilities 

that need awakening within...

slowly, gently, lovingly calling me forward

as new life unfolds.

I sense a need for caution and prudence as this new

energy emerges.

There is a need to stay closely tuned to the 

movements of my soul speaking within. 

I feel an openness to the "Voice of Silence" and It's wordless call.

I feel a yearning to connect with the Infinite Spirit of God...

to express His message of Love and Hope
in a world full of uncertainty and despair...

To bring Peace...if for a moment...

 into a troubled heart.

              10-23-2005